So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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