It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
