You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I want a musical about memes.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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