Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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