Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Randomize
