The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
