dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
