Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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