I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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