HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
