I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
