Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
