Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
