she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Text me some of your sweat
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize