I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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