I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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