I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
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