he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize