Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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