I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
