So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
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