I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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