I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
