my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Randomize
