How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
How does one acquire holy water?
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Randomize
