Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
