wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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