He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
We left the knife in your bed.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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