Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize