Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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