i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
then he tried to convert me to islam
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
