how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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