I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
