she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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