Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Randomize
