i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
The air was thick with penises
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
