you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Randomize
