with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
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