What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize