I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
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