her vagine was all disorganized.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize