we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
