I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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