Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
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