Pregnant stripper...not hot.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
