Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Girls should come with a carfax report
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Randomize
