scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
