you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
i out mim tonsoeep
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