break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
