My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
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